USA [SIC] -- President Donald Trump today criticized the Pilgrims
for not giving him thanks for their bounty on Thanksgiving Day.
"Thanksgiving," he wrote in a Twitter post, "is
a holiday when we should give thanks for the good things we have in life, like
my many billions of dollars and my golf courses and my huge intellect. And the
Russians. I have the best things to be thankful for.
"But the underrated Pilgrims," he continued,
"thank God and the Indians for their harvest and good health and blah,
blah, blah, but it's me they should be thanking. Ungrateful! #MAGA"
When reminded by a follower that the Pilgrims celebrated
their first Thanksgiving more than 400 years ago and weren't, technically,
Americans, Trump responded, "So, they're Democrats, then. I knew it."
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